Posts Tagged ‘relationships’

What Are Pre-Relationships for?

December 13, 2008

By Chris Smith

“Baby I’m sorry it’s not you it’s me.” “I cheated.” “I don’t know where I see us going years from now.” “Are you sure they’re not yours?” Relations between two people who have “feelings,” for each other are some of the most complex traditions of our U.S. society today. This is because, over decades of time, norms have changed over and over again. From the acceptable age that people can be married, to interracial couple’s acceptance of in society, the norms of relationships are subjective in nature. It was normal for children the age of thirteen to get married in the past, but in the present it is not. It is normal for marriages to end in divorce in the present, but it wasn’t in the past. And now it seems like a new change should be confronted: pre-relationships.

Pre-relationships can go by many names to the youth. To name a few: “bun joint,” “main squeeze,” “boo,” “baby,” and the most common of all, “boyfriend,” and “girlfriend.” (more…)

Good Things Are Rare to Find

December 9, 2008

By Ashley Ragland

I think friends are wonderful thing to have but true friends are rare to find. A good friend is someone who will be there for you, stick with you, and have your back no matter what the circumstances are. They are loyal and honest to you and they will never lie to you. You should be able to trust a good friend enough that they can keep your deep secrets and never betray you. A good friend will listen to you no matter how many times they’ve come to you about the same situation. They should want to be there for you even when you hit rock bottom. A good friend knows who you truly are and when things happen like rumors they should never have to question your character; they should just defend you. (more…)

Anything Worth Having Is Worth Working Hard For

December 9, 2008

By Alisha Washington

The best things in life are free but majority of these things require a lot of hard work. If you take the time to lay out everything of worth that you own whether it be your job, your education, your house, your car, the relationship between you and a loved one or even your own life, you will realize that it has taken a lot of hard work to get to and maintain the stability of these relationships. The obstacles that get in the way of you getting from the bottom of the ladder to the top of the ladder only make you stronger, wiser, and help you reach a fulfillment of its importance.

For instance, I am a college student working hard to get a degree in biology in order to further a career in medicine. (more…)

The Divergence of Love

December 8, 2008

By Anonymous

I find myself always over analyzing everything in life, from clothes to my future. I even catch myself speaking out loud sometimes because my mind overloads with so much. I find the most preeminent topics in my thought process are getting through this torturous undergrad experience I’ve had, graduate school, grades, how I appeal to other people, being a good person, my relationship with God, life after school, and traveling. Now in the topics mentioned, the one I’ve left out is the one I have had the most trouble wrapping my mind around and it’s Love. Now my views on this may and probably will differ from most people’s and also I’m not giving any advice, just sharing a personal perspective. I feel the need to vent on this because, although opinions and perspectives may diverge, I believe that somehow we can all relate on the topics of Love.

I once heard a quote where someone said love is an ability, which is different from what we have all been accustomed to hearing, which is that love is a feeling. (more…)

Without Getting to Know Me

December 8, 2008

By “Breaking Point”

Instructor’s Note: The author of this piece says that she “wrote this essay not just as a writing requirement but to make a point.” She has made that point by sharing this piece with people in her life. She shares it here under a pen name, knowing that there must be others who feel the same.

Just because I don’t speak out in class doesn’t mean I won’t speak out in defense. If I choose not to argue don’t assume that you’ve won. People in my life, as long as I can remember, have been judging me. “ I can tell you’re smart because of your glasses.” “You don’t sound black to me.” “ You’re a nice person so I know you can’t fight.” These are just some of the things I’ve heard growing up. As a matter of fact, just recently a guy I know from psychology class told me I didn’t sound black. Even though that wasn’t the first time I’ve heard someone say that to me, it still bothered me. Back then I would have just laughed and let it seem that it didn’t bother me, but for some reason I decided to respond. I asked him what did he mean by that? And to my surprise he said, “ You know, you don’t curse and you sound all educated and stuff.” I looked at him questionably and asked, “ Are you saying black people are supposed to curse and aren’t supposed sound educated?” I must have made him feel stupid because he looked confused and didn’t say another word till the end of class. (more…)

How a Child Spells Love

December 6, 2008

By “Mac-N-Cheese”

Instructors Note: Don’t skip this very powerful piece by the “Mac-N-Cheese” writing group, who elected to structure this meditation on family as a dialogue, with each team member sharing his or her story and the whole group summing up with an important lesson rooted in real-life experiences.

“If I had my child to raise over again, I’d build self-esteem first and the house later. I’d finger paint more, and point the finger less. I would do less correcting and more connecting. I’d take my eyes off my watch and watch with my eyes. I would care to know less and know to care more. I’d take more hikes and fly more kites. I’d stop playing serious and seriously play. I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars. I’d do more hugging and less tugging. I’d see the oak tree in the acorn more often. I would be firm less often and affirm much more. I’d model less about the love of power and more about the power of love.”
Diane Loomans
How a Child Spells Love

LW: As a young black male, I found that having your parents around as you grow up is a big part of how you will become when you get older. I grew up with both of my parents around me, but my dad was always working. As I got older my dad started to talk with me and my brother more, to whereas now we have a better relationship. Most kids nowadays don’t ever get to obtain what I have. Their mom or dad could be in jail or dead. (more…)

Relationship Behind Bars

November 24, 2008

By Ashley Lowery

Instructor’s note: Ashley wrote this powerful piece in response to the prompt to write a descriptive essay about “a place that shaped you.”

Tom and Jerry, Spiderman, and Batman are all childhood cartoons that I enjoyed; however, I was unable to watch these cartoons on Saturdays. Instead, I was hugging my mother from a jail cell. More than a fourth of Baltimore city mothers are incarcerated. As a result the children are left to be cared for by family members or even the department of social services. By my mother being incarcerated, I only have vivid memories of visiting my mother in different jails. The ordeal of visiting my mother consisted of mentally and physically preparing myself, arriving at the jail and getting searched, and then sitting in a waiting room only to see her through a metal gate for a short period of time; this describes my relationship with my mom.

Deciding on an outfit to wear was a hassle. I had to make sure I didn’t wear any sleeveless shirts or shorts above the knee. (more…)